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Three Word Story [Archives]

Posted: Sun Jan 24, 2010 7:25 pm
by Tazerz
Ok so having full stories copied onto ridiculous pages is a bit awkward, so I decided to stick em on a separate thread :)

I guess this also doubles up as a discussion thread :P I will edit this post to link to each story if needed.

#1

Once there was a great legend, one so unbelievable that even he had so much trouble believing it. Nobody knew leprechauns have existed since the prehistoric times. One peculiar feature of these creatures is that they have no thumbs. You might be curious how they dance the leprechaun on one leg while on fire. The answer is they are fireproof. Why would they set themselves on fire like idiots?! You will notice the leprechauns also have BIG hairy very strange looking ears, which can help them protect tiny iced doughtnuts from the big mean doughnut thiefs. Now on this serious topic of strange deformed leprechauns, one must accept certain amounts of lies, chilli powder, when inhaled by Leprachauns causes lying! So in summary, NEVER! approach a chilli powder sniffing, doughnut hoarding Leprechaun!

Re: Three Word Story [Archives]

Posted: Sun Jan 24, 2010 7:26 pm
by Tazerz
This one's a monster! My fault for not having time to wrap it up in one go earlier. Enjoy :)

#2

Moving on from the absurd and rather preposterous claims about Leprechauns, Trolls can be quite difficult, but we simply pay them with chocolate money; chocolate makes them groggy and compliant. So it's easier to just stuff large pieces of plain milk chocolate into your pockets in order to quickly and qiuetly be done with and get the trolls to start a wiggle dance.
This ancient dance is performed naked but not by just the trolls, it's also performed by Servinius (:D) and many of his trained animals. It is truly an eye gouging scene. Despite its hideousness it is mesmerizing.

The wise man once picked a pig's foot for use in a remedy to cyre the hypnotic effects of the scene. Since then the dance has been all the more less effective at preventing young virgins from being found. This change necessitates from approaching the supply yet rough strong hands of monkey poo flinging.
You may wonder what relevance this has to the dance of the wiggle prone trolls of upper Scarsdale, New York depends on what you already know about wildly gyrating trolls.

In the time you read this, ten trolls have found large round bulbous malignant growths protuding from their very shapely buttocks. All attempts to avert one's eyes from these deformities has resulted in strange odors and inexplicable pain behind the sinus cavities. How these symptoms wanting to jive coherently with this really obnoxious malady, nothing compares, nothing to thread killing, unless of course undertaking the task using a hammer unless, of course using your head to break a seemingly prehistoric fruitcake! In an emergency, please use hammer to break fruitcakes as the crust has become as hardened as a frost witch's backside. Apply force to the jackhammer, and hold on tight to be sure it doesn't slip off the fruit bat's furry little vermin that attach to the sewer walls and ceilings.

"Great Scott!" He was known as until the truth revealed his name as Scott the great destroyer of ridiculous titles. Furthermore, Scott loved donuts more than redheads!